Weight the F?

Dear friends,
Im so silly that I just have to make fun of myself. Im 36 years old. 5" tall and not stick thin. I'm one of those woman that has said that I dont even want to be skinny. Those kind of girls look ill. They look like they need a few big fat cheeseburgers to put some cushion on those biscuits.
 And Im also a liar. I would not be telling you the truth if I said I dont want to be skinny. I want that more than I want chocolate!! Wait, obviously thats not true either. Chocolate is my number 3 reason that im not skinny. Number 1&2 reasons are constantly changing. One day its my hubby that cant do anything right so Im so busy working around the house that I cant get to the gym. btw- I say this even after he has cleaned the whole kitchen... #2 is usually whatever excuse I can come up with before i put my Nikes on and can get through the door.. Ive even used the excuse that my toenails feel like they are too long to feel comfortable in my shoes,so I go do some nail trimming, then realize i took so long that I'd only have 15 minutes to actually work out. Oops. I might as well not go. The other reason is obvious.. I have to catch up on the Greys Anatomy shows that I've DVR'd
Weight stinks. Almost everyone I know, atleast all my friends that have kids, will all say that it takes work to be in shape. I think Im just Lazy. Or I could get all psycho babbley about it and say that my inner Kiki wants to be overweight so my hubby will keep his hands to himself at night....Nope. I could be 300 lbs and the man would still be Horny.:) How many times have I said.."Not tonight, I just dont feel pretty".Does this work? Hell no! He looks at me like I'm one big steak and He is R E A L L Y hungry. Fine go ahead.....
My favorite psycho Babble crap is that I better not look toooo good ..or Brian Urlacher from the Chicago Bears might actually want to sleep with me and I would lose all control and commit the ultimate sin. That would really be bad .........for everyone except ME!
Or I might just have to be as pretty on the inside as my smoking hot body and Im really not all that nice. Kidding!
Whatever the reason, Atleast Im not having all of these "skinny bitch" problems. I love myself and my horny hubby!
Now its time for a lil snack....
                                                  *Kiki