Have you found yourself between the lines yet? On one line is your husband and young kids. Above that line is your parents that have reached retirement and have regular monthly prescriptions. In the middle of those lines is where I am at. I feel like there is a constant ticker reminding me that we live by a certain time clock. My clock is screaming Cuckoo! Cuckoo!
My mother is 65 years old and has had many health issues. Last year was a doozy! Without getting into specifics about ailments lets just say it was a very difficult and trying time. My father will be 75 this June and deserves a Purple Heart for his courage during these health battles. Thier marriage is a true love story. Im a little biased.
My marriage however seems to be a reality check everyday. My hubby is great ...but when I look into my childhood, my memories of my parents marriage doesn't look like mine. When did they argue? When did they discuss finances? I dont remember my Dad telling my Mom not to go to the Mall...even when everything in the mall was on clearance. Oh Wait, that is one of my excuses.When did they fight over cleaning the kitchen? or yardwork? When did they find time to actually talk or even have sex? O.k I dont want that answer! Anyways, My point is that they sacrificed alot for me and my siblings. Six of us in all and I can say they made it work and made it look a little too easy.
I check in with my Dad every morning and with my Mom most nights before bed. To put some light on how close we truly are...They are my First phone call ...when im crying my eyes out or when Im screaming really loud with excitement!! They are my... Home! My go-to Peeps!
I will admit my dads advice sometimes isn't great. He will always take my husbands side in arguments. lol My mom does too but she will always add that Im really right in the end. Gotta Love the bond us women have! Regardless what needs to be done for them, I vow to make sure they are taken care of. Haircuts, Prescriptions, helping to understand medical bills... All these needs are still not as important as sittting around thier table just visiting. I get asked alot...."What do you have to talk about since you just talked to them this morning?" My reply will always be..I got to spend some TIME with my Mom and Dad. On the really special visits one of them will remember something from thier childhood and share the memories with me. I will treasure my memories of them forever and take every opportunity to make even more!!
The real important things in our life are not what keep us so busy. I find myself complaining about taking the kids everywhere, cleaning our house, sticking to the ever shrinking budget, what to make for dinner that isn't from a chain restaurant... and also finding time to have sex..lol These are really not that important. I think they are .....untill I get a call that my Moms byopsy came back positive for cancer again. Or that My dad just called an ambulance for Mom, then called me crying like a baby asking me to please get there fast.....or taking my Dad to the E.R. the night before Easter because the strongest man I know can't handle the pain in his abdomen.
Watching them get older is pretty scary. I have so much respect for all that they do for everyone around them. They put themselves last in every decision they make. They have seen the ocean only one time in their life. That was only because they went to witness a good friends wedding. I feel that I can't do enough for them. Being in the middle of raising my family and making sure that my Parents are happy and being taken care of is my life now.............and I wouldnt change a single thing!!
So glad to see you blogging again! You know I've read this a few times, and relate to it in so many ways. While my dad has already passed away, my mom is an amazing woman and so active every day! At 72, she is an inspiration to me. But watching Neal and Janet, and the struggles they are going through on a day to day basis is an eye opener for sure. The love they have for each other is amazing, and the sacrifices he makes for her are never ending. Trying to find enough time to be there for them is my top priority! Thanks for sharing girly. Love you!
ReplyDeleteThanks girl. I knew this would hit you in the heart also. Your very close to your Mom and not to mention the health issues with Jan.I sat down to write about something totally different and this just poured out. I was still typing when the phone rang. I answered it and It was my mom. That was when I realized that I had tears streaming down my face...It was so surreal. I decided to post this without making any corrections. ...Thanks for reading and thanks for making me want to write again!!
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